THE BEST TURKEY YOU WILL NEVER COOK IN YOUR OVEN AGAIN! [Updated 10/30/2019]

EQUIPMENT:

        A KETTLE CHARCOAL GRILL – WEBER IS THE BEST YOU CAN GET

        A LARGE BAG OF CHARCOAL
        A TURKEY  (with me so far?)

A turkey cooks faster on the grill than in the oven – and by cooking it outside, it frees up the oven for the yummy stuff like casseroles and pies.  Remember the USDA HAS CHANGED ITS INTERNAL TEMPERATURE FOR WHOLE POULTRY TO 165º

OOOOOOOOK….. first of all, the bird needs to be 100% thawed – best way for this – buy a fresh bird!  Speak to your market meat department and have them reserve a fresh bird for you - especially if you need a big one for a crowd, because they don't usually get in lots of big ones.  If you can only get a frozen bird, thaw it in a large cooler.  Put the wrapped bird in, cover with COLD water and put it where you'll be reminded to check it.  It takes a 20 lb. bird about 16 hours to thaw in a cooler of cold water.  On cooking day, unwrap the bird and remove all the innards and put your hand up inside - if there is still any ice, cover it again with FRESH cold water and check after an hour.  The bird really needs to be properly thawed but it's not safe for poultry to be left sitting on the counter for very long.

About 20 minutes before the ‘start cooking time’, remove the innards (from both openings – OMG, I’ve cooked one with the stuff still inside!  LOL) and thoroughly wash the bird inside and out, scraping out any leftover bits of organs that are always left behind from processing – rinse REALLY WELL and pat dry with paper towels inside and out.  Place the turkey in a shallow pan (just for transport - not for cooking) and grease the entire exterior surface with a thin coat of Crisco solid shortening, sprinkle LIGHTLY with kosher salt and lots of ground black pepper, and insert a meat thermometer [See P.P.S. below] in the thickest part of the breast.

Wrap the OUTSIDE of a 9x13 brownie pan with heavy duty aluminum foil – this will be your drip pan – drippings make great gravy, especially after you fish out the 1-2 lumps of charcoal that inevitably fall in the pan.

These grilling directions are basically taken from the Weber Grilling Cookbook - if all else fails, FOLLOW THEM!  If possible, set up your grill out of the wind, as that can really effect the grill temps AND can make the charcoal burn away more rapidly.

Prepare the grill for INDIRECT cooking.  Most may know this already, but ‘indirect’ means the charcoal is NOT directly below the meat.  Weber has rails or ‘D’ shaped baskets for indirect cooking – you place the grilling rack over these and there are little hinged thingys built into the rack you can lift to add charcoal (which you need to do every 30-45 minutes.)

Light the grill and get the coals white hot – spread them behind the rails or if you have the ‘D’ baskets, set the baskets against opposite sides.  Put the drip pan down the center and put the grill rack on top – and place the bird over the drip pan.  Add 6-8 new briquettes to each side and close the lid (making sure the bottom and top vents are open.)  Set the timer for about 30 minutes and add 6-10 briquettes to each side, depending on how much they have burned down.  Continue adding charcoal every 30-45 minutes until the bird is done. 

[Editorial comment:  One charcoal briquette will provide roughly 25º for half of a kettle grill, so start with 14-16 pieces on EACH SIDE – this yields about 350º of heat inside the kettle.  DON’T BE TEMPTED TO SNEAK PEEKS AT THE THERMOMETER - every time you lift the lid you lose all your heat and increase cooking time…. It will seem like forever before the thermometer starts to move but once it does, it will move rapidly.  Add your charcoal quickly and close the grill as fast as possible]

APPROXIMATE GRILLING TIME [UNSTUFFED]

10-11 pounds                              1-3/4 – 2-1/2 hours

12–14 pounds                             2-1/3 – 3 hours

15-17 pounds                              2-3.4 – 3-3/4 hours

18-22 pounds                              3-1/2 – 4 hours

When thermometer reaches 160º-165º in the thickest part of the breast, check the knee joint – juices should run clear and there should be no redness at the bone.  The turkey will continue to cook a few more degrees after you remove it from the grill.

REMOVE BIRD FROM THE GRILL AND LET IT SIT LIGHTLY TENTED WITH FOIL IN THE CORNER AT LEAST 30 MINUTES BEFORE CARVING.

The hardest thing about this turkey will be keeping people from picking at it before you carve it!

I make gravy with the pan drippings, including any ashes I can’t fish out.  Use a little of the fat to make a roux with flour over medium high heat.  Gradually whisk in a mixture of pan drippings and turkey stock.*** When gravy is nice and thick, add the cooked meat pieces (from the cooked neckbone, etc) and cook another minute to warm them up.   Season gravy with salt and pepper to taste.

Stand back and enjoy the oooooooh’s and aaaaaaaaaaaaaah’s from your family and guests, and have a wonderful meal.

*** STOCK:

Rinse those things you took out of the cavity - the neck, gizzard, and heart (TOSS THE LIVER IN THE GARBAGE).  Add these to a heavy saucepan along with a quartered onion, 2-3 stalks of celery with leaves, and 10-12 whole peppercorns.  Bring to a boil and then reduce to simmer for about an hour - until the meat on the neck in tender.  Fish out the neck, gizzard and heart with tongs and set aside for the gravy.  Strain the liquid into a bowl and toss the veggies in the garbage.  Voila - Stock!  


P.S.  Cut the COOKED gizzard and heart into tiny pieces; pull the meat from the neck and pitch the bones.  Set the meat aside to add to the gravy.

P.P.S.  Another thing I recommend.  Even if your turkey comes with a pop-up thermometer, also use a regular 'stick in the meat and leave it' thermometer - you really need to see the temp as it rises.  You could add charcoal and put the lid on and that pop-up thing could pop up as you walk away - and when you come back your turkey will be overcooked.

P.P.P.S.  Finally (finally, I know) if you are nervous about trying a turkey on the grill, don't do it when you're having a special event....buy a turkey and try it one weekend just for the family - turkeys are almost always available, and they are cheap compared to most meats these days.  Cook one and work out the kinks - I promise you won't be sorry!

P.F. CHANG’S LETTUCE WRAPS

SERVES: lots

INGREDIENTS (FILLING):

8                  dried shiitake mushrooms

1 tsp.            cornstarch

2 tsp.            dry sherry

2 tsp.            soy sauce

2 tsp.            water

Salt and pepper

1 1/2 lbs      boneless, skinless chicken

5 TBSP         vegetable oil

1 tsp.            fresh minced ginger

2 cloves       garlic, minced

2                 green onions, minced

2 small        dried chiles or dash of Chipotle pepper(optional)

1- 8 oz.       can bamboo shoots, minced

1 -8 oz.       can water chestnuts, minced

1 pkg           cellophane Chinese rice noodles, prepared according to package       

COOKING SAUCE:

1 TBSP         Hoisin sauce

1 TBSP         soy sauce

1 TBSP         dry sherry

2 TBSP         oyster sauce

2 TBSP         water

1 tsp.           sesame oil

1 tsp.           sugar

2 tsp.           cornstarch

Iceberg or bibb lettuce leaves

DIRECTIONS:

Cover mushrooms with boiling water, let stand 30 minutes then drain. Cut and discard woody stems.  Mince mushrooms.  Set aside.

Mix all ingredients for cooking sauce in bowl, and set aside.

In medium bowl, combine cornstarch, sherry, soy sauce, water, salt, pepper and chicken.  Stir to coat chicken thoroughly.  Stir in 1 tsp. oil and let sit 15 minutes to marinate.  Heat wok or large skillet over medium high heat.  Add 3 TBSP oil, then add chicken and stir fry for about 3-4 minutes.   Set aside.

Add 2 TBSP oil to pan.  Add ginger, garlic, chiles (if desired), and onion; stir fry about a minute or so. Add mushrooms, bamboo shoots and water chestnuts; stir fry an additional 2 minutes.  Return chicken to pan.  Add mixed cooking sauce to pan.  Cook until thickened and hot.

Break cooked cellophane noodles into small pieces, and cover bottom of serving dish with them.  Then pour chicken mixture on top of noodles.  Spoon into lettuce leaf and roll. 

STICKY CHICKEN THIGHS

SERVES: 4-6
INGREDIENTS:

1/2 C        Dark brown sugar
2 TBSP      Soy Sauce
1 clove      Minced garlic
1/2 tsp      black pepper
1/4 C        Fish sauce
1/3 C        Water
1 TBSP      minced fresh ginger
1/2 tsp      red pepper flakes
3 TBSP      Rice wine vinegar


1 TBSP      oil
3              scallions – sliced
12            chicken thighs (boneless)

DIRECTIONS:

Combine first nine ingredients in a bowl and whisk until blended.

Remove fat and skin from chicken

Heat oil and sauté scallions until tender. Add chicken and cook until slightly brown

Add sugar mixture. Turn heat to high and bring to a boil. Reduce heat to low and simmer 25-30 minutes, turning often.

Remove meat from pan and reduce sauce by half.

Serve over chicken

CRAB CAKES

YIELD:  8-10 CRAB CAKES

A note about 'canned' crab.... there is pasteurized crab (lump, body, or claws) found in the COLD FOODS section of your supermarket.  It's FREST, not frozen.... very expensive IMO..  I DO buy the LUMP for my lump crab appetizer, simply because the pieces are lovely and there is very little work for ME to do prepping the crab.

Having said that, when I make baked (or God forbid FRIED) crab cakes for a meal, I actually prefer the canned crab that's in 6-oz cans like tuna on the 'canned meat' shelves in the grocery store.  It has a stronger 'crab' flavor that holds up well to baking.... AND IT'S CHEAP!)

                            

INGREDIENTS:

2 - 6oz     cans Lump crab meat  (like pictured above) (Save a can to use as a                      mold)
1               Egg, beaten
3/4 C        Mayonnaise
1/2 C        Chopped celery
1/2 C        Chopped bell pepper
1/2 C        Chopped green onion
1 TBSP     Fresh lemon juice
1 tsp.        Worcestershire sauce
2 tsp.        Old Bay Seasoning
2 tsp.        Yellow mustard
1/4 tsp.      Fresh ground black pepper
Dash          Franks Original Hot Sauce

 1 stack        Ritz cracker crumbs or Panko crumbs

DIRECTIONS:
Preheat oven to 425*F.  Grease a rimmed baking sheet with Pam or butter and set aside

Drain the crab meat and set aside.  Crush about 3/4 of a stack of Ritz crackers and set aside (remove the lid from one of the cans to use as a 'mold'

Combine egg through hot sauce in a bowl and blend thoroughly with a fork.

Add crab meat and toss GENTLY just to blend.

Add cracker crumbs, tossing VERY GENTLY.  Continue adding crumbs until most of the liquid has been absorbed.  DO NOT OVERWORK THE MIXTURE - CAN'T STRESS THIS ENOUGH!

Use a can to shape into patties – DO NOT COMPACT MIXTURE when making the 'cakes'.  [Wash and dry the crabmeat can - spritz with a little shot of PAM...fill the can with the crab mixture and tamp lightly with a fork.  Gently invert the can on the baking sheet and shake gently to remove the contents - then repeat]  There may be a bit of runny liquid oozing out of the raw patties - nothing to worry about - that's typical.

Bake 10-20 minutes until light golden brown in a 425 degree oven........

Serve with cocktail or remoulade sauce.

As an aside - this recipe (using 1 - 6 oz cans of lump crab meat) makes a great stuffing for flounder fillets for two.... lay a fillet on the baking sheet with DARK SIDE DOWN, add salt and pepper.... spread with the crab mix.... add salt and pepper to the other filet on top of the crab mix with the DARK SIDE UP.  Bake until the fish are flaky - 12-15 minutes.  Let rest 2-3 minutes and then slice into two 'sandwiches' and serve!  Doesn't crab stuffed flounder sound wonderful!

CHOCOLATE SOUR CREAM POUND CAKE AND FROSTING

This is the richest, most moist chocolate cake you will ever make!  The secret to this (and any cake, for that matter) is 'sweating' it until it's cool.

SERVES:  12

INGREDIENTS (SHOULD ALL BE AT ROOM TEMP - except the boiling water!):

1 C              butter

2 C              sugar

3                 large eggs

4                 square semi-sweet baking chocolate – melted

2 tsp.           vanilla

2 tsp.           baking soda

2-1/3 C       all-purpose plain flour – sifted after measuring

1/4 tsp.       salt

8 oz.            sour cream

1 C              boiling water

DIRECTIONS:

Preheat oven to 325º.  Grease and flour a Bundt pan.

Combine flour, salt, and baking soda and set aside. 

Cream the butter and sugar until light and fluffy.  Add eggs, one at the time, beating well after each addition.

Add chocolate and vanilla and beat well

Add flour ALTERNATELY with sour cream – beginning and ending with flour.  Beat well after each addition.

REDUCE MIXER TO LOWEST SPEED and very slowly add the boiling water.  Batter will become very thin.  Scrape bottom of bowl to make sure batter is well blended.

Pour batter into pan and bake 45-55 minutes until a bamboo pick inserted just off-center comes out clean.  Remove from the oven and let cool 5 minutes in the pan.  Turn out onto a plate and PLACE IN AN AIRTIGHT CONTAINER AND LET THE CAKE ‘SWEAT’ UNTIL COMPLETELY COOL. 

Frost or dust with powdered sugar.

  

FROSTING FOR SOUR CREAM POUND CAKE

INGREDIENTS:

1 stick         butter – room temperature

1 box           10X powdered sugar

1                 egg – room temperature

1/4 C           hot water

4 squares     Semi-sweet baking chocolate – melted

DIRECTIONS:

Cream butter, egg, and melted chocolate until smooth.  Gradually add powdered sugar, blending well.  Add hot water A FEW DROPS AT THE TIME if needed to make smooth.

SPAGHETTI SAUCE [REVISED 10/25/2021]

SPAGHETTI SAUCE

SERVES 4+

INGREDIENTS:

 

1 lb.                  Italian sausage (hot or mild)

2 lbs.                 Ground beef (73%)

16 oz carton      Mushrooms (use at least 3/4 of the box) – rinsed and sliced                                  

1 large               Bell pepper - chopped chunky

2 large               Yellow onions - chopped chunky

10-12 cloves       garlic – peeled and chopped (I use a whole head!)

3 T                    grapeseed oil

2 or 3 - 28 oz     Petite diced tomatoes - undrained

1 – 14 oz. can     tomato paste

2 shakes            Red pepper flakes (optional)

4 - 6 tbsp          Dried basil leaves (or half a bush if you have fresh!)

1-2 tsp              fresh ground black pepper (more if desired)

1 C                    red wine – one you would drink WITH the spaghetti

               Kosher salt to taste (add at the end of cooking time) 

               Grated (real) parmesan cheese (not the shaker kind)

 

DIRECTIONS:

Start cooking the hamburger meat in a large cooker or Dutch oven.  When it is grey and sorta broken apart, drain as much of the grease as possible.

In a separate pan, cut each sausage link into 4 pieces and cook over medium heat, stirring to prevent sticking.  Poke with a cooking fork to remove some of the grease.  When the sausages are a bit browned, remove from heat and DRAIN AND DISCARD grease.  Add sausages to the pot with the beef.

Meanwhile, in a WOK or large frying pan, add 1-2 tablespoons of grapeseed oil and sauté the onions and bell pepper about 3-4 minutes; add the mushrooms (and another T. of oil or a gob of butter if the pan seems dry) – sauté 2-3 minutes and then add the garlic last – cook ALL the veggies about another minute or two and remove from the heat.  (DO NOT let the garlic brown, as it will get really bitter)

Add the diced tomatoes and the tomato paste to the meats and stir. Rinse the paste can with a little water and add to the pot.

Put on medium heat and add the sautéed veggies, red pepper, basil, and black pepper.  Add 1/2  C of red wine, bring to a boil and reduce heat immediately to a very low simmer.  Cover and cook about 30 minutes, stirring occasionally to prevent sticking on the bottom.  After 30 minutes gradually add remaining 1/2 C of wine, stirring well.  Simmer another 15-30 minutes and remove from heat.

Salt to taste.

Note:  if you like oregano, toss some in - I don't care for it so it's not listed above

Serve over WELL DRAINED, UNRINSED pasta with REAL freshly-grated parmesan cheese on top.

Great with a salad and crusty bread!

CRAB STUFFED MUSHROOMS

SERVES:  6-10

INGREDIENTS:

1-16 oz box White mushrooms – medium size

2 T.             Butter
1 T.             Oil

1 small        Onion – minced

4-5 cloves   Garlic – minced

6 oz can      Crabmeat – drained *** (check for bits of shell)

1/2 C           Bread Crumbs

Grated FRESH Parmesan Cheese

DIRECTIONS:

Remove and save stems from mushrooms; mince stems

Heat butter and oil over medium high heat; add stems and onions and sauté for 2-3 minutes; add garlic and sauté another 2-3 minutes.  Remove from heat and gently stir in crab meat and bread crumbs - do NOT overwork or it will become gooey

Arrange mushroom caps on a greased baking sheet; fill with stuffing; top with grated parm 

Bake 20 minutes at 350º

*** can be made with a can of tiny shrimp, but rinse, drain well and chop ‘em

BLACKENED FISH

INGREDIENTS:

2 fillets/person      Orange roughy  or other medium thick fillet

4 Tbsp            Paprika

1 Tbsp            Onion powder

1 Tbsp.           Garlic powder

1 tsp               Dry mustard

2 tsp               Cayenne pepper

1 Tbsp            White pepper

1 Tbsp.           Black pepper

1 tsp               Ground cumin

1 Tbsp            Ground oregano

1 Tbsp            Crushed basil

1 Tbsp            Ground thyme

2 tsp                Ground sage

1 Tbsp             Sea Salt

         

1 C                 Melted UNSALTED butter

DIRECTIONS:
Combine all the spices in a Ziploc bag and massage to blend.

Heat a heavy cast iron skillet until extremely hot – 10 minutes

Rinse fillets and pat dry.

Pour 3/4 C melted butter in a shallow dish.  Dip each fillet into the butter, turning once to coat both sides.  Using a spoon, sprinkle with spice mixture on both sides (don’t dip the fish in it), patting gently into the fish  (Store any remaining mixture in an airtight bag)

Place fillets in hot pan – do not crowd.  Pour about a teaspoon of melted butter over each fillet.  Cook until fish has a charred appearance (about 2 minutes).  Turn fillets and repeat adding butter.  Cook until charred.  Remove and serve.

AN EXHAUST FAN IS A MUST, AS THIS WILL SMOKE!

NOTE:

Can also be used for blackened shrimp (15-20 count.... cook 1-2 minutes on each side)

SHRIMP GUMBO

SERVES:   8 as an appetizer or 4 as a meal

INGREDIENTS:
1/2 lb              Andouille Sausage (orSmoked Kielbasa sausage –  sliced)                                                                          
1 large             Onion – chopped
1 medium       Bell pepper – chopped
3 T.                  Oil

3 TBSP         Old Bay Seasoning
1 tsp.             Cayenne pepper flakes
1 - 14 oz         Diced tomatoes
4 C Stock     Shrimp or chicken (I use shrimp stock)
3/4 C             Rice (20 minute kind)

2 C               Sliced, frozen okra (NOT breaded) *
2 lb               Shrimp – peeled and deveined (21-25 count)
                      Sea salt

( *for fresh okra, sauté in a tablespoon of oil 10-15 minutes before adding to mixture to get the sticky out)

DIRECTIONS:

• Saute first three ingredients in oil until tender
• Add next five ingredients – bring to a boil and reduce to low – simmer 15 minutes
• Add okra and simmer 4 more minutes
• Add shrimp and simmer 3-4 minutes
• Salt to taste

Note:  If gumbo sits in the pot or if its refrigerated, the rice will absorb a LOT of the liquid.  Add more stock to achieve the consistency desired.  And remember, the shrimp will be done in less than 4 minutes - longer cooking will make them rubbery

 Serve with cornbread.

REMOULADE SAUCE

THIS IS THE REMOULADE SAUCE IS MY VERSION OF THE SAME SAUCE SERVED IN RUTH'S CHRIS RESTAURANTS - I GOT THE 'ALLERGY' LIST OF INGREDIENTS AND SPENT A DAY WORKING OUT THE PROPORTIONS.... IT'S TO DIE FOR!  WONDERFUL FOR A LUMP CRABMEAT SALAD OR FOR GRILLED SHRIMP (OR GRILLED CHICKEN) - I CAN EAT THIS WITH A SPOON!

YIELD:  About 3/4 C - will keep in refrigerator 3-4 days

Ingredients:
1/4 C      FRESH Parsley – finely chopped - loosely packed
1 tsp.       Crushed Garlic (2-3 cloves or used bottled)
2/3 C      Mayonnaise (Hellmanns)
3 TBSP  Creole Mustard
2 tsp.      FRESH SQUEEZED Lemon Juice
1 tsp.      Worcestershire Sauce
1 tsp.      Tabasco


Directions:
MAKE A DAY AHEAD

Combine all ingredients a day before you want to serve the sauce. Keep refrigerated for 1-2 weeks

SAUTEED SEA SCALLOPS

Category: Meat & Seafood

Style: American

Special Consideration: Quick and Easy

Servings: 4-6

Description:

A WONDERFUL WAY TO ENJOY SUCCULENT SEA SCALLOPS - I SERVE OVER LINGUINI (BOILED IN SHRIMP STOCK, OF COURSE) WITH CRUSTY BLACK BREAD AND A SWEET COLE SLAW

Ingredients:

1 pound fresh bay scallops

Salt

Pepper

4 TBSP. butter (divided into two pieces)

1 tsp. oil

4-6 cloves garlic - minced

1/3 cup dry white wine or Vermouth

2 TBSP Fresh lemon juice

2 tsp chopped fresh thyme

Directions:

Rinse scallops and pat dry. Sprinkle with salt and pepper.

Add oil and 2 tablespoons butter to a large skillet; heat over medium high heat about 1 minute. Add scallops to pan, a few at a time, cooking 1-2 minute per side or until they are golden brown on the outside but still translucent in the middle. Place scallops on a heated platter and cover with foil.

Return skillet to burner and add garlic and cook for about 2 minutes. Do not let the garlic brown. Add wine, lemon juice and thyme to pan and cook another 2-3 minutes to reduce by half. Remove from heat and stir in remaining butter. Return scallops to the pan and toss with the sauce. Serve immediately.

[As a delicious alternative.... roll the SIDES of the scallops in finely ground pecans before cooking]